That Sinking Feeling

Note: This post is purposely vague in many places.  That's because it concerns an idea for a possible side business/hobby job thingy that I may one day pursue.  Family members will likely know what I'm talking about, but in case anyone else actually reads this, I'm still being secretive.  Sorry.

The other day, I woke up as usual, got dressed and popped on the morning news while I ate my cereal.  Thrown in between the weather updates and the non-stop Bin Laden is dead news, they threw in a quick teaser for a segment that would air that evening, about an unusual area start-up business.  A few words in to the promo, I stopped munching and muttered an expletive.  As the story continued, my heart sank into the pit of my stomach as I realized that I was conceivably witnessing the end of a far-flung dream of mine.

By day, I work in the aerospace industry, designing and validating airplane parts.  They either go toward allowing people to jet across the globe, or else "defending the homeland," a nice euphemism for military parts.  I prefer not to focus on obliterating desert countries halfway across the globe when I work on those.  If I were to describe my job, as a friend suggested, by explaining how I help people, I could say that I help people travel quickly and efficiently.  It's frequently challenging, and requires a unique set of skills that I've studied and trained for.  There are down days, but unless I'm being overly negative, it's a pretty good job.

But I've long felt that this isn't the only thing I have to contribute to the world.  It is certainly part of it, but as I've grown more aware of my interest in food, I've brainstormed a lot about what I could do on the side or in the future in that arena.  I've been slowly ramping up my knowledge and experience in both cooking and food production, so those are possibilities.  I also have been sporadically writing about food on this blog; in this information age, a more focused food site could be an option.  Or I could just, as many do, work a job that is by all accounts pretty decent, and spend my free time on food stuff that interests me.  I've bandied about concepts in all of these areas, but there's been one consistent front-runner that I always figured was the best idea.

Now, to be sure, it wasn't really a novel idea; there are people all over the globe doing what I had in mind.  But as far as I could tell, were it to get off the ground, it would be the first business of its kind in central Iowa.  I dreamed about it, but never really made any measurable progress.  And apparently while that was going on, another person in the area was making progress, since the news story showed them doing exactly what I'd thought about, right in my own backyard.  Talk about a kick in the gut.

I've gone through all sorts of reactions since that story aired, but they all fall into three categories; three paths forward from here.

1) Give up.  There are so many reasons this business idea would be hard to make work.  It takes expertise which I don't have, a bunch of land or building space, and a ton of start-up capital (which I sure don't have).  So it's easy to say that I couldn't have done it in the first place, and to simply let these others fill the niche.  But in a sense, that's just rationalizing.  I don't have expertise, but I sure could have started experimenting or researching instead of idly dreaming.  I don't have the space for it, but I could have looked into renting some, had I researched just how much I would need.  Same for money - I know it would take a lot, but can't quantify how much without having done research.  With research I could have looked into business loans or whatever, but this was always more convenient as a dream than a plan.  Regardless of all that, I could still let it go.  The local guy has land, and from the look of his setup on TV, has the money to have all new flashy equipment.  It would be hard to beat that, so I could just not bother.  Alternatively, I could...

2) Compete.  That's what America is all about, right?  If you want to sell mousetraps, build a better mousetrap than the other guy and go after him.  If everyone gave up just because someone else was in the market, it would be a very dire marketplace indeed.  I'm sure there were already burger joints around when Ray Kroc opened the first McDonald's, but he was able to compete directly against the others and has (obviously) thrived ever since.  Another benefit to letting others try first is to let them discover some of the pitfalls.  When I was touring an aircraft manufacturer in Kansas, I asked them about carbon-fiber composites, and the engineer replied that their company preferred to let their competitor do all the legwork, and they would pick it up if it proved viable.  At the time it sounded kinda scummy, but it does make sense in a way.  This business idea is a niche market, but I've got an ego just like anybody else, so why couldn't I do it better than the other guy?

3) Adapt.  This is probably the most likely scenario.  I'm not sure I can just give up on doing something related to food.  That Pandora's Box is open, and I realize food is my "thing."  But this business concept is only one way to approach such a broad topic.  Maybe instead of either giving up or going all-in, now is instead the time to retool and reconsider.  The same issues I had before the story broke are still there: I haven't done any research or preparation.  What I really need is to take some time, step back from the "holy s**t" emotion of seeing this news story, and figure out what I truly want to do.  If it really is to stick with my original plan, then I can go for it.  But there are a lot of ways to crack the nut of being passionate about food.  Producing it, preparing it, educating others about it - plus all the different subsets thereof.

I'll admit, I was incredibly disappointed when I saw the footage of smiling people doing what I'd imagined myself doing in some far-flung reality.  But I hadn't put in the grunt work to make that future happen yet, and I can hardly begrudge others jumping in where I haven't.  If nothing else, this has served as a good wake-up call.  If I'm serious about a food-based side job, don't spend two years just fantasizing about it.  Granted, even if I'd begun preparations two years ago, I probably wouldn't be ready to do anything on par with the new guy yet, but I would sure know which option above I should choose.  If two years had passed without positive progress, option 1 looks good.  If I've learned a lot and think I have a chance, go with #2.  Wishing for it isn't a strategy, and once I know what I want to do, it's not a path I'll plan to take again.  Cuz believe me, the reality check can pack quite a punch.

Postscript - I wrote this piece in pretty much the immediate aftermath of having learned about the guy in central Iowa starting up exactly what I wanted to try, so it may come off as slightly negative, and I think it really rambles a bit.  I don't think things are so dire as I may have made out in this article, though I still am a bit disappointed.  As implied above, I'll continue thinking about food and cooking on the side, and maybe one day it will be a career, but even that isn't as imperative as I've made out.  Sometimes I get this feeling that I have to make something out of all this, when I really should just chill out and enjoy it.  All that said, it's a few hundred words that I wrote and it's been forever since I've blogged, so I'm gonna post it anyway, even though I really don't like how it's written.  In the meantime I'll be happy to just keep cooking and growing.  :)